California (PA) outfielder attacked by Fence Monster

ball player 2

In front of one of the largest crowds that California University of Pennsylvania has ever seen (in their stadium that seats a whopping 32 people), one of the team’s star outfielders made an absolutely remarkable catch of a foul ball.  That’s when things got ugly. The outfielder’s leg was promptly grabbed by the rarely seen fence monster.

(Video via @BleacherReport)

After spending upwards of 4 minutes in the grasp on this fence monster, finally, with the help of coaches and teammates, the player was freed.  When asked about the experience he said “There i was just minding my own business, going for a foul ball that would have ended the 6th inning, when I felt something bite down on my leg.  I had no idea we even had any fence monsters here in Pennsylvania.  I thought those things weren’t allowed outside of West Virginia.”

A 1978 photograph of the rarely seen West Virginia Fence Monster

A 1978 photograph of the rarely seen West Virginia Fence Monster

News of the attack spread quickly throughout the town.  Within an hour, word of what happened reached the town mayor and, rightfully so, he declared a state of emergency.  At the press conference he said “I will not allow these fence monsters to infiltrate our happy existence.  We will fight them through the air, by sea, and by the land if needed, but mostly by land because they’re fences, you know?”  After giving his speech he personally handed out pitchforks and torches to all the towns-people and led them through the streets in the direction of the now vacated fields.  Here is an artist’s rendering of the mob:

We didn't have a real sketch artist on the payroll, so we borrowed the local cartoonist

Down with Fence Monsters!

After many hours of walking from block to block looking for the fence monster the towns-people gave up and headed home to watch Glee.  A final check with the outfielder found him to be reeling from the event “yeah, my leg hurts a little, but  I’l l be able to play tomorrow”.  If I were him, I’m not sure I’d be able to play baseball ever again.

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