Dwight Howard chooses the Houston Rockets


It’s over. Finally. Free agent center/whiner/5 year old Dwight Howard has a home: the Lakers the Rockets the Warriors the Rockets the Lakers the Rockets. At least for now. Give him a few hours and he’ll be ready to demand a trade, and he can’t even sign until July 10th. Apparently he didn’t want to play second fiddle to Kobe Bryant. Instead he gets to play second fiddle to James Harden. He didn’t like Nash’s age, so instead he gets Lin’s turnovers. Solid logic from Dwight, as usual.

With Dwight on board, Kevin McHale’s fate as Houston’s coach is sealed. In fact, Dwight will probably have him fired by the time you finish reading this. In fact, he’ll probably get McHale fired, have Houston bring in Stan Van Gundy to get him fired again, then have them bring in a third coach. The clock is ticking. Assuming that happens, he’ll be the 4th playoff coach from last year to leave their team. None of which was Mike D’Antoni. Although to be fair, last year’s Lakers shouldn’t be considered a playoff team.

But remember that Dwight Howard/Andre Igoudala/Andrew Bynum trade involving the Magic, Lakers, Sixers, and Nuggets? While the other 3 got stars, the Magic seemingly took on some old chicken bones the others found in the trash. Everyone thought they ate the bones in the deal. All 3 of the stars have new homes. Who’s eating the bones now? Magic GM Rob Hennigan channeled Shaq when talking about the Dwight decision: “Hey, Kobe, tell me how my ass tastes.” Uh…we’ll pass.

What will the Lakers do now? Do they dare sign Andrew Bynum? Could they offer Pau Gasol to the Phoenix Mercury (for the 99.9999% of you that don’t know, that’s a WNBA team) for Brittney Griner? NOTSC sources had the Lakers pushing hard for a sign and trade involving Dwight and Griner before the decision, but Phoenix wasn’t interested. Pau is just as much of a woman (especially on defense) as Dwight without the indecisiveness, could that change things? It’s worth a shot.

Have the Rockets shot themselves into title contention? With Jeremy Lin at point guard? Please, NBA2K wouldn’t even allow that…even on rookie. So ultimately it’s up to Dwight now to pull off the never before seen “ruin 3 organizations in 3 years.” If he can pull that off, he’s Hall of Fame bound as the greatest organization destroyer of all time. No pressure. Remember: he hates that.

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