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Matt Flynn arrested on grand larceny charges
- Updated: October 7, 2013

It’s been a crazy career path for Matt Flynn. He played in 2 games as a Packer in an offense that even Mark Sanchez could’ve thrown for 300 yards in (well maybe if you count interception yards, anyway) and put up a 480 spot against a Lions secondary that would’ve been torched by Savannah State. Everybody flipped when they saw this, thinking he was the second coming of Jesus mixed with Joe Montana, and he somehow earned himself a 3 year, $19.5 million contract from the Seahawks.
Needless to say, thanks to Russell Wilson, the fun there didn’t last long, and he was shipped to Oakland for a couple Oakland A’s bumper stickers. They gave him another shot at starting, and again, the fun didn’t last long, thanks to Terrelle Pryor (who would’ve ever expected that?). He dropped as low as 38th on the depth chart at QB, even falling behind a JaMarcus Russell fathead. Finally, mercifully, today he was released. And, much like the rest of his career path, the fun didn’t last long. But this time he wasn’t benched.
Hours after getting released, Matt Flynn was arrested and charged with Felony Grand Larceny, for stealing over $14 million from the Seahawks and the Raiders. A police spokesman on the decision: “After reviewing the evidence of Matt Flynn becoming 14 million dollars richer for starting one game, it was clear it had been stolen. Nobody just gives that kind of money away, especially to a quarterback that can’t stop getting benched. Okay, maybe the Redskins, but they’ve got RGIII now. It’s clear this was stolen, we just have to find the gun and ski mask.”
Bail hasn’t been set, but considering the charge, it’ll likely be pretty high. But considering how desperate teams like the Browns, Vikings, Bills, and Jaguars have gotten at QB, odds are one will likely be willing to pay it. And if he hires an attorney like Jose Baez or the team that represented George Zimmerman (and obviously he’s got the money), he’ll be good to go. Then Matt Flynn can start one more time and get benched yet again for a young QB behind him. It’s the Matt Flynn circle of life.