New Year’s Resolutions for every MLB Team


Everyone is excited for 2014, mostly because many people think that’s the number of game Alex Rodriguez has been suspended. The new year is upon us, which means it is time to make new year’s resolutions. We contacted each Major League Baseball team so we could share their resolutions with our readers. Every team is covered, (yes, even the Astros), and they’re divided by division. Clickthrough (by clicking the page numbers at the bottom) and check ‘em out.

First up: the AL East.




Baltimore Orioles

Determine if Chris Davis’ “prescription” for “B12 vitamin injections” can be covered under Obamacare.

Boston Red Sox

Adhere to as many superstitions as possible. For example, have the entire team follow Jonny Gomes’ lead from 2013 and not shower for the entire season.

New York Yankees

Steal the Derek Jeter wax figure from Madame Tussauds to play shortstop since it will be more durable than Jeter himself and have nearly as much range defensively.

Tampa Bay Rays

Sell out more home games….by moving them to a local Little League complex.

Toronto Blue Jays

Study why we’re still not more beloved in Canada than a Montreal Expos franchise that hasn’t existed for nearly a decade.

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