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REPORT: The Vikings fear Adrian Peterson has brain damage

PetersonBrain

2012 MVP Adrian Peterson is tired of playing with pee wee caliber QBs. Tarvaris Jackson. Bounce pass specialist Donovan McNabb. Joe Webb. Christian Ponder. Matt Cassel. The list goes on and on and on. It looks like a list of names that sit on the waiver wire for 10 straight years in your Madden franchise. He got a brief glimpse of NFL caliber QB play when Brett Favre came to Minnesota after his 43rd retirement, but eventually age finally caught up with Favre, as you can see in the picture below:

BrettFavre

Is this Brett Favre or Moses?

Fast forward to 2014, and the Vikings are still searching for a QB that doesn’t already qualify for social security when he joins the team.

Adrian Peterson has an idea for that. The Eagles have made numerous off-season moves, signing 95% of the metro Philadelphia area to a contract extension before free agency began. One name they refused to touch was Michael Vick. They have no interest in bringing him back, in any capacity. Not even janitor. They’ve even talked about taking him to the human society and having him put down (fair is fair after all). But if Vick can find another job, he can be saved. And he may have AP to thank.

Peterson tweeted this:

The Vikings saw this tweet and according to a report, immediately rushed him to the emergency room for extensive concussion testing after Peterson revealed he wasn’t wasted when he sent this. “We take brain trauma very seriously,” said one Vikings official. “It’s clear to us something is very very wrong here. Who in their right mind would think Michael Vick would make anyone a playoff team? He can’t even do that in Madden. And look how he spelled instantly. We may have a real problem here.”

PetersonFan

After reading his insane tweet, Peterson fan prays the concussion tests come back negative

See what happens when you expose someone to Christian Ponder for multiple years? Early tests reportedly revealed no concussion, but sources say the Vikings aren’t convinced. They’re taking him for a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, as many opinions as possible until they know 100% for sure he has no brain damage or Peterson admits he was really only kidding about this crazy tweet (would be quite a sick joke).

One thing is for sure: the Vikings better fix their QB problem fast, or Peterson could go crazy enough to ask for Tim Tebow. And no one wants that.

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