Thunder fined for embarrassing the NBA by losing to the Lakers


The Thunder took on the Lakers on Sunday March 9, and everyone was expecting another one of those kinds of blowouts that make you uncomfortable watching it because you don’t know if it’s actually legal what one team is doing to the other.

After all, the Lakers had just given up over 400 points in their last 3 games and even resorted to cheap online tactics at the end of getting slaughtered by the Clippers:


Still goes as a loss on your record.

Well, there was a blowout for a while, it just wasn’t by who they expected. No, the Thunder didn’t cancel the game with the Lakers and play the Heat instead, they actually trailed the Lakers…by 18 at one point. Yeah. Now this kind of embarrassing play can expect to bring consequences, and that’s exactly what it brought. Sunday night Adam Silver fined the Thunder $500,000 and will make them forfeit 3 draft picks for embarrassing the league by actually losing to that hot mess of a team.

“This is simply unacceptable behavior,” Silver said. “Arrested for pot? Driving under the influence? I can handle things like that. But losing to the LAKERS? I could take 4 members of my family and beat that team by 20. How does a supposedly elite team like OKC actually lose to them? Pathetic. So I’m fining them and taking away draft picks for this black stain on my league. I’m also going to make them wear purple L’s on their forehead so everyone knows what kind of losers they really are.”


Adam Silver, laying down the law

After learning the news, Kevin Durant was still confused. “I can’t figure this out,” Durant pondered. “We were crushing all these playoff teams, then we add an all star, and now we suck? How does that work? OH WAIT…I know, because Russell Westbrook’s been an NBA player for 6 years now and he STILL hasn’t learned the meaning of the word pass. Maybe if he puts some freakin’ lenses in those ridiculous glasses he could see how wide open I am. PASS. THE. BALL. RUSS.”

Durant was getting mad, and he still wasn’t done. “You know where we should take the $500,000 fine out of? Scott Brooks salary. He doesn’t do anything. Ever. He’s been playing Flappy Bird on his iPhone for weeks while I ran the team by myself. But then he screwed up, like everything else he does, and deleted the app. Now he can’t get it back. So is he coaching? Hell no. Now the guy sleeps on the sideline all game. We could put a fathead of my face on the sideline and get better coaching.”

Turns out that Kevin Durant is in fact, not nice. And the Thunder have a lot of problems. Also, if you listen closely, you can hear James Harden laughing his ass off in Houston.


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