New York Yankees: A True Underdog Story

By NOTMLBTonight
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Updated: April 4, 2013

It’s been a tough start to the season for the scrappy upstarts from the Bronx. Before the season began, they were inundated with doubters proclaiming their inferiority to that powerhouse north of the border. They opened with back-to-back home losses to the Red Sox in what once was a can’t-miss rivalry, but now feels like watching a slap fight on Maury with two brothers fighting over which one impregnated the Tampa Bay Rays.

Injuries have certainly taken their toll. The Captain, Derek Jeter, remains out due to lingering issues with his ankle, which has been aggravated frequently when whichever model he happens to be dating at the time steps on it while dancing. Mark Teixiera was lost to a wrist injury during spring training after going to dinner with teammates at Buffalo Wild Wings and trying to take the last chicken wing from CC Sabathia.

While Teixiera’s return is anticipated for early May, Alex Rodriguez’ season debut is a little more uncertain. A-Rod starts the season on the disabled list due to eye strain from constantly staring at his mirror. “I love when all these people say, `You can’t do this. You can’t do that. You’re done. You’re old,'” he stated prior to the Yankees’ home opener. At least, that is what is assumed that he said. He had his back to reporters at the time while leering at a small mirror hanging in the back of his locker.

It’s not all bad news on the injury front. Mariano Rivera has returned to the field after missing all of 2012 with a knee injury. Mo looks strong, too, and ready to lock down all of the Yankees wins. Experts agree, projecting the closer to go a perfect 5-for-5 in save opportunities in 2013. Rivera, who will retire at season’s end, is mentally prepared for the finish: “I’ve been blessed to have a great career. Now I’m ready to put an exclamation point on it and compel this franchise to no longer assign my #42 to any other player ever again.”

Manager Joe Girardi is already struggling with finding a suitable lineup amongst the rag-tag collection of pseudo athletes left in the dugout: “It’s the most difficult experience I’ve ever had in baseball….and I played for the Cubs. Twice!”

General Manager Brian Cashman lamented the challenges that loomed ahead: “What am I supposed to do with only a $230 million payroll? This isn’t amateur softball! I guaran-damn-tee you that George wouldn’t have been pinching pennies at a time like this.” He has a point. George Steinbrenner would not hesitate to throw more cash at Cash to find a solution. The problem today, however, is that very few players are open to playing for such a struggling franchise at any price. 53-year-old former major leaguer Tony Phillips was offered a 2-year, $31 million contract, but opted to try out for the independent York Revolution of the Atlantic League instead. “I’ve only got 4, maybe 5 years left,” said Phillips. “I’d like to have a legitimate chance to win something.”